I am a 17-year-old girl and I would like to become a mother one day. But my family don’t want that. I have difficulty learning new things. So I shouldn’t become a mother. I think that’s unfair. Should I really not be a mother when I’m older?

You might want to speak about this with your family.
You can get help to do this.
Perhaps you can get help from an adult you trust.
There are also so-called advice centres where you can get help.

In Germany any woman can become a mother.
But you don’t have to become a mother.
The decision is not simple.
You are still very young.
You have lots of time to make this decision.
It’s ok to give yourself time to make the decision.

Advice centres can also help you make the decision.
If you become a mother, you will always be a mother.
Being a mother is not easy.
You can get support: http://www.behinderte-eltern.de/Papoo_CMS/index.php?menuid=98
A baby takes up a lot of time and costs money.
Your child should do well.
Your child should also be happy.
It’s great when people help you do this.

I am 15 years old. I was pregnant and I terminated the pregnancy. The others at school say that I am a murderer, that I killed my child.

You didn’t want a child yet.
You decided to have an abortion.
That is your right.
An abortion is not murder.
In Germany there are rules about when you can get an abortion.
When is it permitted?
When is it not permitted?

Others may not understand you.
They may want to know why you did it.

You can say to them:
I don’t like what you’re saying.
What you’re saying is hurtful.

You can also explain why you did it.
Then they might understand you.

But you do not have to explain.

Can you get pregnant from kissing?

No, you can’t get pregnant from kissing!
You can only get pregnant when sperm cells get inside or very close to the vagina.
I.e. when you have sex.
Even if the penis is only briefly inside the vagina.
Sperm cells come out of the penis.
These sperm cells can fertilise a woman’s egg cells.
You can also get pregnant during your period!
If you don’t want to get pregnant, you should always use protection.

There are a number of different types of protection.
You can get information about types of protection from the doctor or at an advice centre.
You can buy condoms in supermarkets and pharmacies.
They are safe and also protect you from diseases.
The pill, the contraceptive coil and the vaginal ring are types of protection which use hormones.
They must be prescribed by the doctor.

In “emergencies” you can buy the “morning after pill” from a pharmacy.
An “emergency” is when you have not used contraception or when there was an accident with the contraception.
The “morning after pill” must be taken within three days of having unprotected sex.

Text: pro familia München e.V.

I am pregnant. And I want to have the child. What should I do now?

This is a big change for you.

You are allowed to decide what happens next.

That is a big responsibility.

But there are lots of people who can help you.

 

It is important that you take care of yourself.

That includes your health.

You should visit a gynaecologist.

They will examine you.

They will also give you tips on staying healthy.

 

For other questions there is a pregnancy advice centre.

The people there will help to answer your questions.

You can find one on this website:

http://www.zanzu.de/en/themes/being-pregnant

http://www.familienplanung.de/beratung/beratungsstellensuche/

You may need someone to help you search.

The website is currently only in German.

Maybe you can go there with an interpreter.

I am pregnant. And I do NOT want to have the child. What should I do now?

You are allowed to decide whether you want to have the child or not.
You can talk about it with someone you trust.
But you can make your own decision.

You are allowed to terminate the pregnancy.
That is permitted in Germany.
But only when the foetus inside you is still very small.
When you are less than three months pregnant.
If you are under the age of 18 and want to have an operation under general aesthetic,
you must obtain consent from your parent or legal guardian.

You must visit a pregnancy advice centre in advance.
Find an advice centre here: http://www.familienplanung.de/beratung/beratungsstellensuche
There is no need to be frightened. They will only talk to you.
You can tell them why you want to terminate the pregnancy.
Then you will receive confirmation that you visited the advice centre.
You need this confirmation to have an abortion.
They will also give you the address of a doctor or a hospital.
A place where you can receive safe treatment.
Do not try any other method. That can be dangerous.

If the foetus inside you is already older than 3 months, you will have to give birth to it.
Then you are allowed to give up the child for adoption.
The youth welfare office will look for parents for the baby.