I am 14 years old. I have used tampons for my period for a few months. Yesterday I forgot I had a tampon inside and then I inserted a new tampon. Now I can’t get the old tampon out. What should I do?

This happens to many women.
Sometimes you can get the tampon out yourself.
It has not “disappeared”.
The vagina is only a few centimetres long.

Here are a few tips.
Squat down or sit on the toilet.
Try to relax.
It works better when you are relaxed.
Maybe you can get hold of the tampon or string with your fingers.
Also try to “push down” with your muscles.
A tampon sometimes slides out by itself when you push.

If that doesn’t work you must go to your gynaecologist straightaway.
She/he will examine you and can remove the tampon immediately.
A forgotten tampon can make you ill.
So you must go to your gynaecologist soon.
Even if you are not sure if there is still a tampon inside you.
It’s not embarrassing.
It’s important so that you don’t become ill.

My girlfriend has her period. She wants to have sex with me now. Is that ok? She is unclean at this time.

If you both want to you can have sex during a period.
The word “unclean” is not a nice word.
That means that a woman is not ok during her period.
That’s not true.
Girls and women also wash regularly during this time.
They shower and bathe.

Period blood is normal blood.
When you bleed you are not “unclean”.
Your blood is not bad.

There are many ways to have nice sex together.
Even during a period.
For example, stroking the clitoris outside the vagina.
That gives lots of girls and women a nice feeling.
Or touching and stroking the penis.
This is called petting.

Many girls and women are particularly excited during their period.
Sex is particularly nice for them at this time.
Talk to your girlfriend about what you both like.

I am a 14-year-old girl and I have sex with my boyfriend. We don’t use protection. He says that I can’t get pregnant. As I haven’t yet had my period. Is that true?

You ovulate before your first period.
Then your egg is mature and can be fertilised.
Fertilisation is when a woman’s egg merges with a man’s sperm.
So you can get pregnant.

Many girls and women do not notice when they ovulate.
This might be the case for you.
Ovulation always happens before your period.
And even before your first period.

All girls have vaginal discharge before their first period.
The vaginal discharge shows that you will soon get your period.
That might be in 1 month or 1 year.
Some girls notice the vaginal discharge.
Other girls do not.
So you should use protection.
The best option is to use a condom.
A condom also protects you from sexually transmitted diseases.

Lots of my friends watch porn films. I am a 14-year-old boy and I find that exciting. I would also like to watch these films. But my friends say it must be kept secret. I shouldn’t say anything to adults. Why is that?

Young people under the age of 18 are not allowed to watch porn films.
And adults must not allow young people to do so.
It is illegal.

The law is there to protect girls and boys.
Young people are gaining sexual experience for the first time.
They should find out for themselves what they like.
What feels good for them.
And what doesn’t feel good.
Porn films can influence that.

Young people may have had little experience with sex.
So porn films might be confusing.
These films only show sex performed for the camera.
The people and their feelings are often unimportant in these films.
But some young people might compare themselves to these people.
What the people do may not feel good to you.
You might even feel bad when you watch the films.
So young people should not watch porn films.

I am a 16-year-old boy and I have sex with my girlfriend. I pull my penis out of her vagina before orgasm. And we only have sex shortly after her period. Or shortly before her next period. Can she still get pregnant?

Yes your girlfriend can still get pregnant.
What you’re doing is called “coitus interruptus”.
That means interrupted sex.
But sperm can still get into the vagina.
Some sperm comes out of the penis before orgasm.
You won’t notice it.
You can’t prevent it.
This sperm can fertilise an egg.
And your girlfriend can get pregnant.

Ovulation often occurs midway between two periods.
But many women’s eggs mature at other times.
When did your girlfriend ovulate?
She won’t know exactly.
Many girls have very irregular periods.
Periods do not always come at the same intervals.

You can visit a gynaecologist together.
She/he can offer you advice on contraception.

I am a 17-year-old girl and yesterday I had sex with my boyfriend for the first time. I wanted to wash myself afterwards, because I wanted to feel clean. But I was unsure whether my boyfriend would think that was stupid. What do other people do?

It’s normal to have these thoughts.
Particularly when you do not have much experience.
Your thoughts about hygiene after sex are correct.

But you can stay in bed and cuddle for a while.
And then go to the bathroom to go to the toilet.

The female genital area is sensitive.
Doctors say that women should go to the toilet after sex.
Within 30 minutes.
Because the urinary tract can pick up bacteria.
Which can lead to bladder infections.
So it’s important not to wait too long.

Everyone does things differently.
You know your own body.
Do what’s best for you.
You can also talk about it with your boyfriend.
Then he will understand why you are getting up.

I am 13 and I would like to send my steady boyfriend a sexy picture of myself. I’m almost naked in it. But someone at school said that was “child pornography”. Will I get punished?

No, you will not receive any legal punishment.
As a child you are not at the age of “criminal responsibility” until you are 14.
At 13 years old you cannot be punished by law.
Only your parents or guardians can forbid you from doing something.

However, there are a few things you should consider.
For example, your boyfriend can be punished
if he is 14 or over, as he is no longer a child.

Sometimes pictures are illegal because you are only 13.

This is the case if:

  • The photo shows someone under 14 having sex.
  • The photo shows primarily the breasts or the area between the legs.

Irrespective of age, it is illegal if:

  • Someone is talked or forced into taking the picture.
  • This kind of picture is sent to someone who does not want it.

It is also illegal
to send this kind of picture to anyone else without permission.

But that sometimes happens.

If you need help on this issue, you can get in touch with someone here:

http://www.nina-info.de/save-me-online/kontakt-beratung.html

People talk a lot about sex here. I am a 15-year-old boy and I think it is nobody else’s business. Why does everyone talk about it?

Sex is something very personal.
Many people don’t want to talk about it.
But lots of young people have questions.
They are uncertain and don’t know everything.
It is important for you to understand
that you may ask questions.
But you do not have to talk about sex with anyone.

Sometimes talking is good.
There are many reasons to talk about sex:
Young people are experiencing a lot of new things.
They might like to share with other young people.
It can be very exciting!

Many adults can answer questions from young people.
They can give information.
They want to help.
Young people should feel that:
They can talk about good and bad experiences with adults.
They can ask any questions about their bodies and about sex.
They can get help when they need it.

I am a 14-year-old girl and I’ve heard that other girls in school have had a HPV vaccination. What is that? Do I need it too?

HPV is an abbreviation for “Human Papilloma Virus”.
Viruses can cause diseases.
Diseases caused by HPV include:
“Cervical cancer” and “genital warts”.
Cervical cancer is a serious disease in the body.
The cervix is the part of a woman’s body that joins to the top of the vagina.
Genital warts look like small brown or white nodules.
Sometimes the warts itch or burn.

HPV can be transmitted through sex with other people.
Many women and men have HPV during their lifetime.
But not everyone develops a disease from the virus.
A “vaccination” can prevent you from becoming ill.
A “vaccination” is an injection to prevent disease.
This injection helps your body to fight the virus.
You can ask your gynaecologist about this.
She can help you to make a decision.
She can vaccinate you.
It is best to get vaccinated before you first have sex.
Vaccination against HPV is free.

I am a 13-year-old girl and my family wants me to be “cut”. I’m frightened. My family won’t listen to me. Who can I talk to?

You are not alone in this.
Lots of girls are frightened of “cutting” (also known as “female circumcision” or “female genital mutilation”).
Lots of girls do not want to be cut.
Many families do not know that cutting can harm a girl’s health.
Cutting is illegal in Germany.

Some girls find it difficult to talk about cutting.
They are ashamed or they don’t know what to say.
Some can’t find the right words.
Feelings are always okay.

There are advice centres which can help you with this issue.
Places where girls can talk to female adults.
They can talk about fear, shame and any other feelings.
The women there do not judge the girls who come to them.
They want to help the girls.
You can tell the women what you need.

In Munich, for example, the advice centre is called the Wüstenrose (PDF, 3.3 MB).