I (15, girl) have fallen in love. I have a lot of questions about sex. I don’t know who to ask. My parents say: I don’t need to know things “like that” because I have a learning problem. Learning problem means: I need more time and help with some things. Then I understand everything. Who can help me with my questions?

It is very nice that you are in love.
Having questions about sex is totally normal.
Sex is something intimate.
That means: It is only for you and people who you trust.
Maybe your parents are worried that someone might abuse that trust.
But sex is a basic right of all people.
And you have the right to have someone answer your questions.

Think about it: Who do you want to talk to about it?
It could be somebody from your family.
It could be a counsellor.
It could be somebody from school.
Maybe they can give you the answers.
But maybe they do not know the answers.

Then you can ask someone at a counselling center, at no cost.
You can call them or go there in person.
They are very good at answering these questions.
Before you meet them, write down some key words.
That way you won’t forget anything.
Here you will find a list of counselling centers that can help you:
Click on the red sentence “NÜTZLICHE ADRESSEN” (Useful addresses).

I (16, boy) have a girlfriend. We love each other very much and like it a lot when we cuddle and make out. We want to have more sex now. How do we do it right? How does the penis find the vagina?

It is normal that you are unsure.
You have not had sexual intercourse before.
The first time is not easy for many people.
When you have had sex more often, it gets easier.
You get to know each other’s bodies better all the time.
You need experience with each other.

When you caress one another, you get to know each other’s bodies.
You can touch the vagina and feel where it is.
You can carefully push a finger into the vagina.
Your girlfriend can caress your hard penis.
Your girlfriend can insert the penis into her vagina herself.
It helps to talk to one another while you are having sex.

The important thing is: Sex should be fun.
If your girlfriend says: It hurts.
Then you must stop.
You need time to get to know your feelings during sex.
After a while you can be like a good team.

My brother told me: He has sex with men. I (male, 15 years old) don’t understand this. Is it fun?

Yes, it can be fun.

Sex between a man and a woman can be pleasant.
Sex among men can be fun.
Sex among women can also be fun.
There are different kinds of sex.

All people have “erogenous zones”.
“Erogenous zones” are places on the body.
Touching those places during sex makes people feel good.

One of those places is the “prostate”.
The prostate is part of the body.
You can’t see it from the outside.
The prostate is touched by movement inside the bottom.
For example when 2 men have anal sex with each other.
Anal sex in this case means:
One man sticks his penis into the bottom of the other man.
Anal sex can be very pleasant for both men.

Other “erogenous zones” are, for example:
The whole penis, testicles, nipples, or the neck.
When many “erogenous zones” are touched in a pleasing way, sex is fun.

I (16, boy) had sex with my girlfriend today and I hurt my penis. It kinked and there was a popping sound. Now it is swollen and blue. It hurts a lot. Can it be broken?

There are no bones in the penis.
So there can’t be a broken bone.
This does not happen very often.
But: Your penis could have a serious injury.
When someone has this injury, we also say:
The penis is broken.

You have to see a doctor immediately.
The injury has to be treated quickly.
There could be tears inside the penis.
Those have to be operated on.

Please do not wait before you see a doctor.
Go to a doctor who is a urologist.
Or to the emergency room at the hospital.
Tell them: My penis is badly injured.
This is not embarrassing.
You don’t have to say how it happened.
It is important for your health.
Without treatment, your penis could be damaged for ever.

My friend told me (male, 16 years old): Two girls at my school are a couple. When they have sex with each other: Do they still stay virgins all their lives?

No, they don‘t.
For many, “losing your virginity” means:
Having sex with another person for the first time.
It does not matter what gender the other person is.

“Having sex” does not only mean:
Inserting the penis into the vagina.
A person can also have sex with their mouths or with their hands.
What is important is what the person likes.
It doesn’t matter whether the other person is a man or a woman.

That means:
These girls also lose their virginity.
Men can also lose their virginity.
For many people, this is a very important thing.

For many, it means: Becoming an adult.
But you also become an adult if you don’t have sex.
And not everybody who has already had sex is also an adult because of it.

I am a girl and I’m 14 years old. My friends were talking about the G-spot. What is that? Do I have that too?

The “G-spot” is a place inside the bodies of women and girls.
Not all girls and women have this spot.
It depends on their bodies.

The spot is inside the vagina.
It is on the belly side, so at the top, in a way.
Sometimes it is directly behind the entrance to the vagina.
Sometimes it is a little further inside.
Often it feels a little rough.
It can be different sizes.

When the “G-spot” is massaged:
This feels very good for some.
Some reach orgasm easier this way.
Some don’t feel very much at all.
That’s all normal!

The best thing to do: Get to know your body.
Learn what feels good for you.
It is different for every person.

When a woman has sex for the first time: Does she lose more than one liter of blood?

No, usually a woman does not lose that much blood during her first time having sex.
Sex in this question probably means: sexual intercourse.
That means: The penis is inserted into the vagina.

In some women, the hymen is torn during their “first time”.
Here you can read what that is: https://refu-tips.de/en/i-14-year-old-had-my-period-last-week-i-used-a-tampon-and-i-suddenly-started-bleeding-heavily-i-am-afraid-i-may-have-damaged-my-hymen-what-can-i-do-now/
In some women, the walls of the vagina are injured by the penis.
That means: The penis causes very small tears in the vagina.
In the vagina means: Inside the body.
About half of all women don’t bleed at all during their “first time”.

When a woman bleeds:
Most of the time, it is only a few drops.
This is usually not bad.
The small injuries heal all by themselves.
Sometimes a few more drops appear for a couple of days.
That is not bad either.

If there is more blood:
Then the woman should see a doctor.

My boyfriend wants me to swallow his sperm. What exactly is sperm? And can you really swallow it?

Sperm is a sticky liquid.
This liquid comes out of a man’s penis.
This happens during ejaculation.
This article tells you what ejaculation is:

If you swallow sperm you cannot get pregnant.
But sperm can carry diseases.
Even when the sperm is swallowed.
If you are not sure if your boyfriend is healthy, it is better not to swallow his sperm.

Sperm tastes different to everyone.
Some people like the taste.
Some people find sperm disgusting.
Both are ok.

You do not have to swallow sperm.
And nobody should force you to swallow sperm.
Not even your boyfriend.

I am a 16-year-old boy and I use a wheelchair. I like hanging out with my friends. They say I can’t have sex. Because of the wheelchair. They say I’m not a proper man. I’m not sure. Is that true?

No, that’s not true.
There is no such thing as a “proper” man.
People are different – men and boys too.
A man can be big or small.
A man can love men or women.
A man can have a wheelchair.
Every man is different.
It’s ok that you have a wheelchair.

There are also different types of sex.
Sexual intercourse is only one form of sex.
Sexual intercourse is when the penis is inserted into the vagina or the anus.
There are also many other ways to have sex.
What’s right is what feels good to both of you.

First find out where you like to be touched.
Tell your girlfriend or boyfriend honestly what you like.
Ask him or her what he or she likes.
Together you can make each other feel nice.

I am a 17-year-old boy and I was wondering if I can use the same condom twice?

No, you can’t.
If you put a condom on the penis for a second time, sperm can accidentally get on the outside of the condom.
Then the sperm can enter the woman’s vagina.
Then the woman can become pregnant.

We have a few tips for you:
Only use condoms from sealed packaging.
Do not use a condom if…
The packaging is broken or open.
The condom is torn.
The expiry date has passed.
You have ejaculated.
You have to pull the condom down the penis again.
The condom does not fit the penis properly.
Then you must throw the condom away.

You can buy several condoms at the same time.
Cheap condoms are sold in drugstores.
Buying condoms is completely normal.
You are showing that you are taking responsibility.
You do not need to feel embarrassed!