My boyfriend (17) is paraplegic. Yesterday he told me that his mother shaves his genital area. Because of the law of purity in Islam. What does that mean? Is it really important that he is shaved?

The law of purity means being clean, as stipulated by religion.
Islam states that a Muslim should be clean when praying.
Your boyfriend is physically disabled.
He might not be able to pray.
If he can pray, then maybe he can shave himself.

If he is religious, he can abide by the rules.
He can decide that for himself.
He can also decide if he wants to be shaved.
But he is not a bad Muslim if he does not shave.
He might find it unpleasant to be shaved by his mother.
He can decide who shaves him.

Your boyfriend has personal rights.
That means for example that he can make decisions about his own body.
And that nobody can force him to do something unpleasant.
Not even because of his disability.

My friend told me: She uses a “contraceptive ring”. I have never heard of that. What is it? How does it work?

The contraceptive ring is a contraceptive – like the pill.
The ring releases hormones into the body.
Those hormones are supposed to prevent pregnancy.
Your gynecologist can write you a prescription.
With the prescription, you can pick up a contraceptive ring at the pharmacy.

You have to insert the contraceptive ring into your vagina.
The contraceptive ring stays in there for three weeks.
After that, you remove the contraceptive ring from your vagina.
You wait seven days and then insert a new contraceptive ring.
It’s best to put a reminder in your calendar.

Important: Hormones can have unpleasant side effects.
Your gynecologist can give you advice about this.
How do you insert the contraceptive ring?
First, find a position that is comfortable for you.
You can squat down.
Or you can put one leg up on the edge of the bathtub.
You squeeze the ring with your thumb and forefinger.
Now you push the contraceptive ring into your vagina.
You’ll know it is in the right place when you can’t feel it any more.

My boyfriend and I (17) would like to have sex this weekend. But I’m going to have my period. My grandmother says: Sex during my period is impure. Is that true?

Sex during your period is not harmful.
If you both want it, it is ok.
Some women like sex during their period and some don’t.
Men are different that way, too.
In some religions, sex during the period is not allowed.
But that is a matter of belief.
If you believe it, you can stick by it.
Medically, sex during that time is no problem.

What is important is that you both enjoy it.
There are different ways to have sex during a woman’s period.
You can gently touch each other’s genital areas.

Do you want the penis to enter the vagina?
Then please be sure to do the following:
Use contraceptives even during the period.
It’s best to use a condom.
You can still get pregnant during this time.
Sexually transmitted diseases are spread more easily during the period.
Be sure to always remove the tampon before the penis enters the vagina.

I (16) have had my period for five days. Yesterday I had sex with a boy. We did not use contraceptives. Could I be pregnant anyway?

Yes, you can get pregnant during your period.
It is very unlikely.
But still, it can happen.

Your egg is only fertile during a certain time of every month.
Fertile means:
You can get pregnant if you have unprotected sex.
You are fertile just before ovulation.
You are especially fertile during ovulation.
You are also fertile for a short while after ovulation.
You don’t know for sure when your ovulation happens.
That depends on the time between your periods.
Do you always have just a few days between periods?

During sex, sperm can enter your vagina.
The sperm can fertilize your egg for up to five days.
It could be that your ovulation is during that time.
Please go to see a gynecologist, that’s a women’s doctor.
She can help you, even if you did get pregnant yesterday.
She can give you a check-up and advise you.

My girlfriend (15) is taking the pill. We sleep together a lot. Sometimes she forgets to take her pill. Can she get pregnant?

Yes, your girlfriend can get pregnant.
Taking the pill on time is very important!
But “on time” means different things depending on the kind of pill.

Is your girlfriend taking the mini-pill?
The mini-pill must be taken at the same time every day.
Your girlfriend should set a reminder in her smart phone.
The phone beeps: Now she has to take the mini-pill.
If she takes the mini-pill later or forgets it completely:
Then her protection from pregnancy is weaker.
If that happens, also use a condom during sex until her next period.

Maybe she is taking the regular pill?
Your girlfriend has to take the pill every day.
At about the same time.
If she forgets the pill:
Please also use a condom during sex until her next period.

If she keeps on forgetting the pill:
Go to see a gynecologist, a women’s doctor, together, and get some advice.
There are other kinds of contraceptives.

I (17, boy) have a girlfriend. She just went to a gynecologist, that’s a women’s doctor. The doctor says that all girls have to go there. Is there also a men’s doctor?

Yes, there is such a doctor.
This doctor is called “andrologist”.
Usually they are also urologists at the same time.
You can see this doctor for lots of things.
When you have questions about sex or about your body.
When something seems strange about your penis.
When you are insecure because your body is changing.

What is important:
You can always go there by yourself.
The doctor can give you a check-up.
If that is what you want.

It is good to know your body.
That way you notice changes.
For some changes, you have to see a “urologist”.
For example if you had hard lumps on your testicles.
That should be looked at by a doctor.
Here is how you can find a doctor near you:

I (16, girl) am in a wheelchair. I have never had a boyfriend. My friends don’t have wheelchairs. All my friends have had boyfriends. Is this because boys don’t think I’m beautiful?

It sounds like your wheelchair is making you insecure.
Maybe you feel “different” than your friends.
That makes a lot of people feel insecure:
When they feel “different”.
Maybe you’ve also heard some dumb opinions from people.
That can make you insecure, too.

But every person is special.
One of the things that make you special is easy to see.
Maybe people talk to you about it.
Maybe that is why you are thinking about it.
“Being beautiful” means something different for everyone.
What is beautiful is what makes you unique.
There is only one of you!

Many girls and boys don’t have a relationship for a long time.
But: Many girls and boys in wheelchairs do have a relationship.
It can happen to you some day.
It is okay if you have not had a boyfriend.

I am 14 years old. I have used tampons for my period for a few months. Yesterday I forgot I had a tampon inside and then I inserted a new tampon. Now I can’t get the old tampon out. What should I do?

This happens to many women.
Sometimes you can get the tampon out yourself.
It has not “disappeared”.
The vagina is only a few centimetres long.

Here are a few tips.
Squat down or sit on the toilet.
Try to relax.
It works better when you are relaxed.
Maybe you can get hold of the tampon or string with your fingers.
Also try to “push down” with your muscles.
A tampon sometimes slides out by itself when you push.

If that doesn’t work you must go to your gynaecologist straightaway.
She/he will examine you and can remove the tampon immediately.
A forgotten tampon can make you ill.
So you must go to your gynaecologist soon.
Even if you are not sure if there is still a tampon inside you.
It’s not embarrassing.
It’s important so that you don’t become ill.

My girlfriend has her period. She wants to have sex with me now. Is that ok? She is unclean at this time.

If you both want to you can have sex during a period.
The word “unclean” is not a nice word.
That means that a woman is not ok during her period.
That’s not true.
Girls and women also wash regularly during this time.
They shower and bathe.

Period blood is normal blood.
When you bleed you are not “unclean”.
Your blood is not bad.

There are many ways to have nice sex together.
Even during a period.
For example, stroking the clitoris outside the vagina.
That gives lots of girls and women a nice feeling.
Or touching and stroking the penis.
This is called petting.

Many girls and women are particularly excited during their period.
Sex is particularly nice for them at this time.
Talk to your girlfriend about what you both like.

I am a 14-year-old girl and I have sex with my boyfriend. We don’t use protection. He says that I can’t get pregnant. As I haven’t yet had my period. Is that true?

You ovulate before your first period.
Then your egg is mature and can be fertilised.
Fertilisation is when a woman’s egg merges with a man’s sperm.
So you can get pregnant.

Many girls and women do not notice when they ovulate.
This might be the case for you.
Ovulation always happens before your period.
And even before your first period.

All girls have vaginal discharge before their first period.
The vaginal discharge shows that you will soon get your period.
That might be in 1 month or 1 year.
Some girls notice the vaginal discharge.
Other girls do not.
So you should use protection.
The best option is to use a condom.
A condom also protects you from sexually transmitted diseases.